When Friendship Becomes a Blur...

Have you ever experienced loss greater than that of losing someone through death? I have and it is the most intense pain I have ever felt. The tears don't come right away, the moments past by in a daze, and you are left in total shock over the end of, what you though was going to be a lifelong friendship. You replay every moment you had with them and you can't understand why things ended the way they did. If you are on the receiving end of hurt, it becomes even more difficult to understand what their reasoning for their behavior toward you was. This can drive you crazy in every way if you allow it. In my experience it left me feeling abandoned and lonely down to the pit of my soul. It made me realize I had placed them before my marriage and even before God. I had given them access to a part of my heart that only God should have access to. THIS WOKE ME UP!!!

First, had to repent for all that I had allowed this person to be in my life before God. We sometimes forget that we have a jealous God and nothing nor anyone should ever come before Him. This was an eye opener to me, we can get so wrapped up in our own lives that we forget how everyone around us can be affected when we don't place God first. The enemy's ultimate goal is to drive wedges into every good thing we have in our lives, from our relationship with God to our relationships with others. I had let the gate swing wide open for Satan to have a field day in my life and my family's life. Since this has happened to me I have been asking God for guidance in how to forgive myself and how to forgive the other person for what feels like a robbery of our friendship. It is hard!! BUT we are never to lose hope, God hears our tears when we can't find the words to say.

The burden of pain is great, but God will never allow us to walk through one moment of it alone. Though losing anyone close to us is heartbreaking, knowing that we have a Father so in love with us and being there to comfort us will bring an everlasting companion who will never leave us nor forsake us. I don't know about you, but that brings joy and peace to my soul!